Tuesday, May 1, 2007
KOMEN HAKIM & ADVOKAT (MINGGU KETIGA)
Kata-Kata Aluan Puan Pearl (Advokat)Before I start commenting on the individual blogger, I would like to say that I’m quite impress with the amount of effort each participant had put in. I know this is hard, particularly that the question was coming from my end and whilst some of you may think that I am specifically expecting to be reading a design write up, you are mistaken. I am looking at how well you are able to bring me into your story and how well you are expressing your story and making me see the same story when I look at the picture.
Each of you have your own style of writing and each of you are unique. Job well done to all. My comments are solely based on my judgment to your assignment only. I am commenting this in English so if our dear Mr UjangMD ever decides to translate it to Bahasa Melayu (Editor:: Tak perlu rasanya kerana peserta kita bukan calang-calang orang kan??), all of you have to thank him from the bottom of your hearts……..
| Intan | AdvokatI was expecting more from you especially after reading your last assignment and was pleased to see you tops for last week. However, I was a bit disappointed that you took the easy way out by just explaining to me about the design image. I look at these everyday at my work and I don’t need to be reading what is the style of the design, what does a balcony do or what sort of curtains are suitable. What is heartwarming at least, that you relate it to your personal experience of FLICKING through your Mom’s collection of Anjung Seri during your short holiday you spent at home. I do agree that your selected image was tricky but our dear Mr UjangMD had even give you clues as to what the image could have been interpreted as. Unfortunately, your downfall was that you were being too analytical about the image being exterior. You have to lessen on that attitude in your next assignment. Next assignment ? Hmm, I don’t know...
Hakim4 paras or almost 200 words complaining about this task. Kau actually explaining every angles of the photo. Setiap satu konsep yang kau explain, you did the pro and kontra, you tried to disagree of this balcony idea, the tones, the flowers so on. Intan, I really hope to see you in the final, unfortunately this entry is putting you to the bottom line. Im trying to consider you to stay here, but if others are way better than you, you are next to go. |
| Kurt_Kuden | AdvokatOne word to describe this submission – EXCELLENT! I was caught emotionally with your story. I even wondered, if I was dining at Beautiful Place, what would be my story to you. The storyline was good. The expression of the red dining counter was a little bit weak but the ending was nicely put. I would expect to see you much longer in the competition. Let’s see if you could impress the Lady in Red instead.
HakimBRAVO!! Korang ni betul bersungguh-sungguh buat kerja yang diberi kan?. Kalau tak kena sepelangkung dengan akak, tak ada lah nak make it up. Akak perati korang ni kalo kena puji, terus terduduk jatuh tapi kalau kena maki, laju je repairkan balik bila come new assignments. How I wish, that story was about me, my life and my love story. Don’t change your size of the font, akak suka baca font besar-besar ni, senang. Nice one, indeed. |
| Katarsis | AdvokatI wish you had spend more time writing about the rich guy who rarely gets the chance to enjoy the comfort of his red bedroom and how would his wife felt about it. Maybe crying all by herself on those lonely nights on the red pillows? Remember, you are suppose to create a story or relating it to your own personal experience. Oh well, I will never get to know your story about it. On the whole, good effort on putting this assignment together. HakimJuzuk foton tu apa? Juzuk quran aku tau lah. Membaca entry kali ini dengan alunan bahasa yang lembut dan tenang cukup menyenangkan hati akak. Tetapi juga orang yang tidak mengenali kau akan mengatakan bahawa kau seorang yang terlalu merendah diri. Anyway, orang kaya empunya bilik tu takkan takde personal accountant to do his own income tax kan? Kan? So overall, kalau mahukan ketenangan pembacaan, bacalah entry Katarsis, mesti nak terus panjat katil lepas khatam. But it's not kick enough to be on top! |
| Kriesz | AdvokatSo Kriez, how would you like to work in my Studio??? I like the way you put your explanation within the story. Although I did mentioned earlier that I wouldn’t want to be reading a design thesis, however, in this submission it works. I have to give you brownie points for TAKING THE TIME and MAKING THE EFFORT to stylized the picture. It would make a bigger impression if the image was much larger though. Lets see if Judge RED could even recognize it. HakimSometimes kita di bawah, tapi kadang-kadang kalau kita berusaha lebih dan berlebih sentiasa, kita akan berada di atas. Tapi kalau kita leka, kita tersembam semula. You have done a very good entry in this task. Akak baca sampai 5 kali to make sure I have made a very good decision on this, seriously, I will be called stupid by Kak Kujie if I kick you out. Apahal Kak Jie nya nama naik lak ni kan (Kenapa tak UjangMD??)….suka hati aku le kan? Your effort dalam both photos should be acknowledged by others, clap clap clap! |
| Mouriey's | AdvokatOh sweet Mouriey…., I’m trying very hard to like your assignment. Though you have written with so much details about the red roses, I don’t feel any connection with the picture or what is the significant of your writing about eating on the dining table apart from you telling me, that this is the place where your stomach is satisfied. Mouriey, I have trouble feeling satisfied with the assignment. By the way, are you sure it’s more than a thousand words? HakimAgain??? This is like the sajak thingy the other day, kau pecah-pecahkan dalam each para. I want to read a story about the photo, not an explanation. Akak dah bagi kau peluang 3 minggu to prove it, but you fail to be on top …not even once. Adios!!! |
| Syawaludin | AdvokatA good story I must say. Just to share, this was a project done for Adidas office in Vietnam. Anyways, doesn’t matter about where this office is, but you have managed to make me capture the mood and your feelings whilst sitting in that room. Plus point for the mix images and links….I LIKE!!!!!!!…..My only concern is that, you have not particularly identify the red item. You only said “hampir semuanya berwarna merah” which is a very general statement. I hope your story could save you because I would want to still see you in the contending for many weeks to come. Let see if you manage to impress the Red Judge!
HakimNot bad. Walaupun masih dalam lingkungan bola and intipati entry was only about the long meeting, but pendek kata, pengolahan or ayat-ayat meleret yang pandai diguna-pakai, buat readers yang banyak cekadak macam akak ni jadi tak jemu reading it through. But kalau orang luar akak rasa dema rajin baca sekali je lah specially kalau jenis yang tak minat bola or sukan. Im stucked here coz I have to make some comments on you. But kenapa yang 2 orang dekat wall tu tak ada story on them ek? Long entry but tak masukkan dema, ni mesti kes tak gali godek google kan? Ko jangan nak menjawab pulak ye, kau tu kaki menjawab, anyway syabas bette. |
| Bro_Rick | AdvokatTo be honest, I was getting worried when I stared reading your submission. I thought, “Oh no….do I have to read another explanation on interior design again..” But when I read further, I was relived that you had a story for me to instead. Your integration of the red lantern lighting in the story was quite creative. I hope you had fun writing this as much as I had enjoyed reading this.
HakimMemula kau explain pasal kerusi lampu dalam restaurant tu. Selepas itu, few paras, kau explain lagi..dan lagi. Kau ingat akak ni bebal sangat ke sampai nak kena explain 2,3 kali Rick oi!!! Anyway, ada lelucon in the entry, I like it, pandai kau geletek akak kan, suka aku. Seriously, this is the best entry compared with the other 2 yang ko dah buat. This one kau boleh dapat A+, very simple but ko kacau mood akak bila ko letak budak umur 4 tahun la babe!!! The romantic part terus gone with the 4 years statement. |
| Maliha_Anoushka | AdvokatOk, I have to confess – I’m not a soccer fan even after meeting Zidane face to face. I had to read your submission 3 times trying to understand and trying to pick up the relevancy of the writing with the picture. Honestly, I was getting bored at the 2nd round reading and doing this at 2am in the morning, I’m not a happy bunny. (I too have a deadline ya, submitting my comments..) I like your creative thinking and I can see that you are trying your best effort to think outside the box and be a bit more imaginative. However, if you would have mentioned that you had watched the match in this cinema where the red and blue walls had made an impact to you and then explain the significance, I could have picked up your point in the first place. Remember, when writing for BKS, you have a wide genre of readers to cover. It needs to be flexible enough for everyone to see your point. Maliha, you have potential of being a strong contender. The question is, would you still be able to do it next week?
HakimI know you have worked so hard for it, but pernah dengar orang kata – gambar yang terhasil walau memberi seribu makna tetapi kalau makna yang dihasilkan jauh menyimpang dari kehendak pembaca, akan membakul-sampahkan entry itu sendiri dik. I donno, you ve spoilt my mood already. Akak baca sekali – akak cakap bosannya. Akak baca kali kedua, demi mengadili entry engkau. And akak tried baca for the third time, it seems that you are not going to be the top 3 anymore, you probably be kicked out. Highly risk here. Sorey Noushy, sorey sorey to you. |
Nota Editor UjangMD:: Minggu Ketiga Ujang lihat kesemua assignment para peserta begitu menyerlah. Ini lah yang Ujang harapkan dari semua peserta. Syabas.. Syabas.. Namun.. peserta terpaksa akur dengan konsep BKS ini. Walaupun kesemua para peserta telah menyajikan kreativiti mereka dengan begitu baik sekali tetapi peserta harus akur dengan penyingkiran seorang peserta bagi setiap minggu. Ujang pun jadi buntu, banyak percanggahan pendapat yang berlaku. Namun semua telah di nilai dengan kredibiliti masing-masing. Advokat dan Hakim saling memberi pandangan yang berbeza. Ranking peserta juga tidak kurang hebatnya. Ada yang jatuh merundum dan ada pula yang naik begitu mendadak. Siapakah peserta tersebut?? Siapakah yang menjadi mangsa ketiga untuk mengikuti jejak Zila dan Milla?? Perempuan lagi kah atau peserta lelaki pula yang terkeluar??? Persoalan demi persoalan timbul. Nantikan keputusan Hakim esok 1 MEI 2007 (SELASA) (2PM) berserta dengan Assignment Minggu Keempat.P/S:: Walaupun esok 1MEI 2007 merupakan Hari Pekerja, tetapi korang semua tak boleh cuti dari membuat Assignment Minggu Keempat ini. Muahahahha. SELAMAT HARI PEKERJA!!
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